Communication Problems / Backwards Bullshit Filter

I'm in the middle of transferring blog entries over to this site. They're such bullshit. I've got to delete them and start over. I just can't believe the stuff I write. What happened to my communication skills? It didn't used to be this way. I used to sound coherent and intelligent. Now I just type like I'm schizo and off my medication. But it's only with certain subjects. Certain spiritual subjects or 'fringe' subjects I just can't communicate about. Not verbally. Not online. Because I'm met with enormous interference. My hands start shaking like I'm nervous, and I can't decide what to say or how to word my thoughts. Then when I finally write something down and proofread it thirty times it still sounds like bullshit. Like there's some sort of backwards bullshit filter that takes everything I try to communicate and makes it smell and taste like shit.

I read over my blog entries and I'm just appalled. They read like something I made up as I went along. And it's hard to follow my line of reasoning. I'm tempted to just start over but what's to keep this from happening again?

Today I read about etheric implants. I've never heard of those until today. What a relief, though, because I'm already convinced I have one of those. It looks like a massive steel collar around my neck, something mechanical that's clamped over my throat chakra and locked into place. Octagonal, heavy, and as wide as my shoulders.

This would explain why it's so hard for me to communicate. And this would also explain why my wife cannot find my throat chakra. All my other chakras are detectable and spinning but my throat chakra is virtually nonexistent.

This would also explain why sometimes I feel like I'm choking when I try to communicate. Not to mention I have terrible sleep apnea as of late and I'm scheduled for a sleep study next weekend.

I hope whatever is jacking with my communication skills, with my throat chakra and with my breathing, that it can be detected, explained, and fucking obliterated. Because I'm frustrated as hell.